Movie time!

I watched it recently, the movie. So just in case you haven’t seen it yet…

                                                     

(*spoiler alert*)

 

 

The movie unfolded to revolve around a man seeking revenge for the death of his daughter and her family in an accident involving and caused by the son of a powerful man in Thailand. And their subsequent framing as the cause of the accident in order to keep the young man from prison and probably save the image of his family.

 

 

While it portrays a lot of themes, dominantly vengeance and forgiveness, one conversation that stuck with me long after the movie was one he(the avenging man,  played by Mark Dacascos) had with his driver-a young woman(played by Vanida Golten) who also happened to be involved in the accident.

 

One of many, but a conversation in which he complimented the quality of her English.

 

(I'm pretty sure you're rolling your eyes now but 'gimme a sec')

It went something like this…

 

 

 

 

“Your English is very good…”

 

‘Well thank you. I studied English in college though that was a long time ago’

 

“I won’t ask about your age if you don’t ask about my white beard”

(both laugh)

‘I watch a lot of movies as well, and YouTube videos. That’s how I practice my English, but I feel my vocabulary isn’t there yet’

 

“Sounds pretty good to me. Besides you’re Thai, you don’t need to speak perfect English”….

 

 

 

 

 

They went further but this was the ‘wow’ part of the movie for me.

 

The last line was not out of spite or anything even remotely close to it but a sincere recognition of her efforts in making her English better.

 

 

This is how I think it would’ve played out with some people I’ve encountered.

 

 

“Your English is very good. Shey you school for abroad before?”

 

‘No, I was born, bred and ‘buttered’ here.’

 

“So you neva travel out before?”

 

‘No, I just practice’

 

“Ehehennn? Who you come dey form for? Abeg talk wella joor”

 

 

Related: Stereotypes in society

 

Some even go as far as ‘demanding’ you speak in a native language.

 

First of all, how someone chooses to go about their English is –as politely as I can muster- none of your business.

If you act or think like that, it would be nice to know that there is more to English than the English alphabet. And while you can leave your learning of the language at whatever level you choose because you are not a Briton or an American, you have no right to vitiate the efforts of another who wants to go beyond that.

 

 

 

In addition, yes you might have come across people who see a high-pitched, R-filled way of speaking English as equal to landed properties, and it may have been annoying but it takes nothing away from the fact that knowledge of and skill in English and its different accents is actually an asset and can be monetized, as seen with voice over gigs.

 

 

Related:Spicing up your vocabulary

 

The man in the movie said it best but I’ll paraphrase it

‘You don’t need to if it’s not your language but who says you can’t anyways’.

 

 

Leave people alone, they’re not forming for you abeg.

Improve your English any way you choose as long as it is improvement. And don’t let anyone try to stop you.

 

Have you experienced a situation similar to this? Share with us.

 

It’s been a bit over six months since this space was created. It might not seem much but on the premise that every big thing had a beginning, I can say that it has been a wonderful experience so far. One that I definitely want to keep going.

 

This is an introduction to a series that I am excited about and hope will thrill you too.

 

Interviews….

 

Yes, interviews. Interviews with people, brands and businesses that I am intrigued by. Ones that I also know will have a relatable feel because they definitely are not Bill Gates or Jeff Bezos(not yet anyway *laughs*), but innovative people as well.

 

 

To start it, I gave myself a surprise interview. I wasn’t prepared for it because I didn’t tell me (no jokes).

Let’s get right into it then.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can we know you?

I’m Bob, a student of Parasitology and Entomology in Nnamdi Azikiwe University Awka. I run a blog on random social topics or issues.

 

What made you start a blog?

Well… honestly I just wanted to start something I could say I had given my time and energy. No really special reasons, I didn’t even have the slightest idea about the basics like the blogging platforms or the rest and still currently have so much to imbibe and implement, but I just wanted to ‘talk’ though not in a video(laughs).

 

 How has it affected you?

To a certain degree, it gave me a sense of responsibility. I know that people look forward to what I put out and I won’t feel proud if I disappoint so I have to think, get informed, put something together and deliver. I also learn a lot in the process so it’s a win-win. I do not feel pressured and I’ll definitely rest if I need to.

 

You said random social topics, how do you choose them?

I get this question as often as not. I get stuck many times. My ideas come mainly from my interactions with people, things that happen around me, national or international occurrences, social media, just about any and everywhere.

Sometimes nothing clicks, no ideas are forthcoming. I just pray and sleep, I literally cannot come and kill myself. Then boom! Something drops.

 

Which post feedback shocked you the most?

I get a lot of heartwarming feedback on many of my posts but my post on how to make a million naira in six days was the most surprising. Money has power everywhere mann!(laughs)

I had the effect in mind but it surprised me that it actually worked, and even more that readers were very okay with it. The statistics with that particular post broke the previous ones by almost a hundred percent and set the pace for my next ones.

 

What is unique about your space?

I share either how I really feel or facts about whatever topic I discuss depending on whether it is an informative or interactive article.

I try to write as I would speak if it were in person, so the ‘imbibe and implement’ line for example, is most likely the same way I would put it if I were face to face with anyone. And I like for this to actually show in my writing style so hopefully, my lovely voice can read out the words to whoever is reading, if we’ve met that is.

And I also try to engage every comment and review. I’m very open to expert advice, suggestions and a little criticism-not too heavy for now, a little(chuckles).

 

What has been your most discouraging moment?

I wouldn’t be lying if I said I don’t know or I don’t remember but comparison can be very discouraging. There are millions of blogs, and many successful ones and their results can be overwhelming at times especially for someone just starting out. There’s also a lot more to blogging than just images and write-ups and jumping into it with just fiery passion is not really the best.

 

One fun fact about the blog

The ‘3B’ in the name ‘3B’s wall’ is actually a nickname of mine. And the fun fact there is that I don’t even know or rather haven’t chosen what it means(shrugs).

 

How has the lockdown affected you?

‘Bloggingwise’ the pandemic was probably one of the best things that happened. Not only because I’m at home with what I need to do it but also because the restriction from other activities (notably-but not limited to-school*winks*) really helped me as a beginner.

 

What has been your greatest motivation?

It has to be from family and friends. My family support me in the most funny ways and it is just outta-this-world. My friends are another backbone. A lot help me even when I don’t ask for it. In reviews, criticisms, yabbings, tokens, genuine comments and so much more. They keep me going, no doubt.

One of the most thrilling is when someone I don’t know or I didn’t personally reach out to, reaches out to me just to say that they appreciate my work. That alone has lit up my moody face A LOT of times and there’s an extra boost it gives that I can’t really put into words.

There’s also the desire to know how this will turn out and what it will grow into, I definitely want to see that.

 

Thank you for the time

Thank you too.

 

 

 

 

 

I had a wonderful time with me and it was really inspiring getting to know how I felt about what I do and I hope you also enjoyed it.

 

How do you feel about the new interview series? Would you rather have something else? What do you want on this space? It is yours as much as it is mine so let’s deliberate in the comments.

 

Share with others too!

 

 

“You’re looking beautiful today…”

‘No oh…’

 

“Your dress sense is really nice…”

‘No oh… It’s just nothing’

 

“You’re such a charming person…”

‘That’s not true oh…’

 

 

  

That right there, doesn't really make you humble or modest. It almost sounds like a case of low self-esteem.

 

The first dictionary definition of humble is ‘…unpretending, real’. In other words, one just being oneself. You being you.

 

The second is ‘…having a low opinion of oneself’ which many people take to extremes in an attempt to be humble.

 

 

“You did such a great job”

‘Thank you. I spent all night on it, I’m so happy it turned out well’

 

Something like that doesn’t sound proud(to me anyways), but rather has an air of genuineness and originality. 

How does it sound to you?

 

 

Related: Making better conversations

Acknowledging one’s efforts and contributions is in no way haughty. It means you appreciate yourself even if others don’t. Self-worth gives you confidence free from what people think and it may come off as pride to some-some with self-image issues of course.

 

If you hate compliments or say you dislike them, then it is either of two things.

One, you may have low self-esteem.

This is more than an assumption. It is actually proven that people with low self-esteem dislike compliments because it contradicts how they see themselves. What they hear is the opposite of what they feel and they almost automatically resist it.

 

See here

 

Two, you just don’t want to seem proud.

And it’s really okay, we all go about things the wrong way sometimes. But you’re also not being genuine, which is part of what humility entails.

If you’re a proud person, it’ll still show despite all the ‘no oh’s you try to cover it with.

 

 

Humility has a lot more to do with acknowledgement than we usually think.

Acknowledging that what we have done or have become or how we look, is indeed a privilege. Acknowledging that it could’ve been anyone else and they could’ve done or fared far better. Acknowledging that there’s always someone better, funnier, prettier and so on.

And also acknowledging our own efforts and decisions, our uniqueness, our abilities, talents, experiences and environment. And accepting them all, aiming to make the most out of all these.

 

Related: The problem with how motivational quotes are used

 

 

In addition, receiving a compliment does not make you obligated to return one yourself. You can anyways, but complimenting is not ‘exchange of goods and services’ or ‘trade by barter’. It is ‘usually’ a sincere verbal appreciation of what someone notices in or on you. You don’t have to look for what to compliment back.

A situation like this is perfectly normal(again, to me).

 

“You’re quite a handsome fellow”

‘Thank you oh, we no two for this life’

 

 

Be free!

Be freer with your receiving compliments and your responses to them. Return compliments if there is a need or if you want to and not because you feel obligated to.

And if you’re doing the complimenting, be sincere and also the considerate-the person you’re complimenting may have image issues and may not react the way you expect. And even if it’s not the case, your wording still matters.

 

Related: Misconceptions surrounding eloquence

 

You’re worth the compliment, relish it.

Be you.

 

 

What’s the most unforgettable compliment you’ve received?

 

2020 has been many things for me. It has held many firsts for me, most notably being that it has become what I call my ‘social media awakening’ year. The phrase sounds special but it just means that I got on Twitter and Instagram(you’re free to shake your head here).

 

I have had my own personal biases towards social media and I still hold, to a certain extent, that it affects interpersonal communication negatively, but in lieu of recent events it is without a doubt established that social media is the new weapon of revolution.

 

What makes me say that?

 

Traditional media is very easily compromised. Many of them can be easily influenced to tell a side of a story favourable to those with power.

Social media on the other hand is as direct as anything can get from source to recipient and back again. And depending on the platform, has means of unifying a subject of interest. Something that is not achievable with newspapers or TV stations.

 

This post is not to tell how I feel about the ongoing movement as many articles do justice to that for me.

Like this one, Mgbodichi on the End SARS movement

 

 

However, this is to hammer on the importance of a ‘why’.

Why this all started, why it is still on, why we want it to continue. The WHYs are so encompassing that they include who we do it for.

 

 

It is actually mentally overwhelming, reading stories or watching clips that tell of victims of police brutality. Victims of a failed system, people killed for the most insignificant reasons and without means to bring the perpetrators to justice. Situations where crimes committed by robbers or terrorists at night are carried out by men in uniform during the day. Brooding over this can easily lead one to depression or a feeling of hopelessness.

Thing is, you might not even need to think on it for it to have an effect on you. Fear of the uniform, thoughts like ‘it could be me next’ or worry for loved ones over things that are not natural disasters or accidents are uncalled for in any ‘democratic’ society.

A popular line goes… only wrongdoers should be afraid of those in power.

 

It is okay to be weighed down, it is fine not to feel okay with all the stories. It is also important to keep hearing them all the same because the power of a WHY is evident in its absence. It is very easy to deviate from a purpose or goal once the WHY has been either forgotten or drowned out by other things.

 

 

Why it started

 

The movement started as a cry of a people who are tired of oppression. People who were tired of being asked for their voices only during election campaigns. People who either experienced(directly or indirectly) or saw the implications of unaccountability of a government to its people. People who don’t want to join others in silence as abuse of power, office or uniform becomes a normal thing.

 

 

 

Why it is still on

 

It is still on because we cannot afford to let it pass as a trend. We cannot afford to have gotten this far and come only this far. We have seen that with just ourselves we have set up systems to aid our cause; systems that a normal Nigeria doesn’t enjoy. And we did it with selflessness, accountability, effectiveness and togetherness- things we want to be replicated in our government.

As in ehh!

We will probably never be taken serious again if we don’t produce results that show generations older and younger, the power of a unified people.

 

 

 

Why it should continue

                                 

There is so much more to address and fight for. We are starting at police brutality and then every other thing that affects us as a people. Things we have rights to but are being sacrificed at altars of personal gains and sheer wickedness. We can only reach them if we continue.

 

 

 
Who do we do it for?

 

·         For those gone: 

      We do it for those who died unnecessarily and those who died for the cause. For those who fell to a system that was supposed to raise them. Names like Tony Zitta and Jimoh Isiaq. For the many gone and many who will still go if this is not addressed. REMEMBER THEIR NAMES!

·         For coming generations: 

      For those who have no idea of what it means to be a Nigerian in these times and who shouldn’t meet it like this. Those who deserve to bear Nigerian as a badge of honour not a symbol of prospective corruptive/criminal tendencies

·         For ourselves: 

      Because we deserve better and should reap the fruits of our labour. And because the National Anthem should not just be a song sang at attention, but a story of people who made a government pay attention.

 

Funny ba? but it's also not.

 

 

These and many more are the core reasons why the movement is on. Why people are protesting, praying, donating and aggressively leveraging social media to get the message out, that change is more than a campaign slogan, it is with the people.

Soro soke!

 

Lend a voice, a hand, a prayer, a naira note(or notes), an information, a tweet, a post, anything you can do to join a worthwhile cause. Raise awareness to what is going on. This is bigger than us and is for us.

 

Add more whys in the comment section and share this post to increase awareness or just to remind them.

 

DON”T LOSE FOCUS!

SPEAK UP!!

END POLICE BRUTALITY IN NIGERIA!!! 

 

There are myths and speculations surrounding the use of mobile phones and the effects they have on our health. Many of them are far from the truth, many hinge on fear and arise from ‘common sense’.

 

What then is true?

 

Phones give off radiofrequency(RF) waves, which is a form of non-ionising radiation.

Radiation is classified into ionizing and non-ionising based on the ability of their photons to effect change in the state of atoms and molecules. Other examples of non-ionising radiation include visible light, infrared, microwaves and FM radio waves.

 

They are not as strong as their counterparts which are capable of damaging DNA in cells, thereby causing cancer. Examples of which are x-rays, UV-rays and gamma rays.

 

 

The amount of RF waves given off by a phone depends on a range of factors from the phone’s make/manufacturer to others like distance from cell towers, closeness to the body(e.g when making calls) and amount of time spent on the phone(calls in particular).

 

Though exposure to RF waves has been shown to be capable of heating up body tissues, it is important to know that phones emit them at a much lower level than is able to do same. Also that the biological effects of a phenomenon do not necessarily correspond to health effects.

 

 

Conclusions from lab studies with rats that showed risks of tumours and other conditions attributed to RF exposure, could not be drawn because the amount of exposure used in the rat studies were somewhat proportional to microwaving a human being-something outside the range of what any phone is capable of.

 

 

A lot of studies have been conducted on RF exposure, most of which had different limitations. Check these articles for more detailed information:

American Cancer Society on cellphones

 Mobile phones and your health-Better Health Channel

The truth about cell phone radiation-Forbes

All however, border on cell phone use as ‘possibly’ carcinogenic and have no statements substantiating it as studies are still ongoing.

 

As for 5G networks, they operate on higher energy than the older generations(4G,3G,2G) but still use RF waves(non-ionizing).

 

 

If you’re still wary of RF exposure

 

·         Keep calls short or text when possible

·         Use Bluetooth devices or corded earpieces

·         Use speaker modes or video chat features

 

 

 

The distancing involved in the above practices and the properties of Bluetooth devices and earpieces are very good precautionary measures.

 

 

 

 

What phone use has actually done

 

1.      Road accidents: There is a direct link between phone usage while driving and increased accident rates. Much so that hand-use of phones while driving is banned in pretty much all parts of the world.

2.      Other accidents: RF radiations are far from best of friends with flammables and are a major cause of fire accidents in homes and places like gas stations. These accidents more often than not result in death or severe burns. It is advised to turn off phones or put them in airplane mode in certain places: home kitchens, gas stations et cetera.

 

 

How much of this did you know before now? How much do you use your phones?

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